Why ladies today still single..

iseng-iseng cek junk mail di e-mail saya...wehehehew...dapet bahasan yang bikin saya ketawa miris..huhuhu...

Top reasons why ladies today are still SINGLE :

1. The nice men are ugly.

2. The handsome men are not nice.

3. The handsome and nice men are gay.

4. The handsome, nice and heterosexual men are married.

5. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men, have no money.

6. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men with money think we are only after their money.

7. The handsome men without money are after our money.

8. The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhat heterosexual, don't think we are beautiful enough.

9. The men who think we are beautiful, that are heterosexual, somewhat nice and have money, are cowards.

10. The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and have some money and thank God are heterosexual, are shy and NEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!!

11. The men who never make the first move automatically lose interest in us when we take the initiative.

NOW, WHO THE HELL UNDERSTANDS MEN?!!

Men are like a fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with. Ironically, women are like fresh milk. We have expired date…and that’s it.

~sigh~

How to explain Advertising in a funny way!

"Advertising? Iklan? Promosi?
Masih dalam rangka jadi dosen-dosenan...supaya saya terlihat sedikit pintar dan dapat menjelaskan materi kuliah supaya lebih menarik... iseng2 browsing cari bahan yang ok dan keren...*haha teteup...pengen dibilangin ibu dosen yang keren..:P*
soalnya berdasarkan pengalaman menjadi mahasiswa....saya sering kali merasa bosan + bingung dengan materi yang diberikan oleh ibu/bapak dosen... pas udah ngerti...eh ternyata intinya sih sangat simple dan sangat menarik...cuma sangat disayangkan cara penjelasannya terlalu dibebani oleh bahasa2 yang berat...
nah...saya menemukan materi kuliah yang sangat..sangat menarik di www.advertnews.com
dan jujur...malahan ada istilah yang ternyata selama ini saya pengertiannya baru saya mengerti..hehehe...*nampak diragukan kompetensi menjadi seorang dosen-dosenan :P*
hehehe...sekarang saatnya kuliah anak-anak....:

What is the best way to explain marketing?

1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: “I am very rich. Marry me!” - That’s Direct Marketing

2. You’re at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says: “He’s very rich. Marry him.” - That’s Advertising.

3. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day, you call and say: “Hi, I’m very rich. Marry me.” - That’s Telemarketing

4. You’re at a party and see gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a drink, you open the door of the car for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her ride and then say: “By the way, I’m rich. Will you marry me?” - That’s Public Relations

5. You’re at a party and see a gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says: “You are very rich! Can you marry me?” - That’s Brand Recognition

6. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: “I am very rich. Marry me!” She gives you a nice hard slap on your face. - That’s Customer Feedback

7. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: “I am very rich. Marry me!” And she introduces you to her husband. - That’s demand and supply gap

8. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say anything, another person come and tell her: “I’m rich. Will you marry me?” and she goes with him - That’s competition eating into your market share

9. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say: “I’m rich, Marry me!” your wife arrives. - That’s restriction for entering new markets

Jilatlah Bos Anda...

A Mathematical Formula Of Success

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24
25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that While Hardwork and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, but it's the Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top.

Some brilliant Math students...

Saya dapet email dari temen saya..lucu banget! katanya siiih...seorang guru matematika di Amrik sono beneran posting hasil jawaban murid2nya (smp sama smu) pas lagi ujian matematika... my favorite! the last one huahahah....! enjoy!

Here are answers from some brilliant American students:
1) maksa...
2) sepertinya si peter udah mentok banget....expand = dilebarkan...3) ngasal abis.... 4) huahahaha...bisa kebalik gitu yaa... maksa part.II 5) THE BEST ANSWER!!!! emangnya nyari si Waldo apa?? hihihi